Now, let me talk and I might sound like your Mom initially, later like the old man’s voice in typical movies. Well, Drop the phones, Look around don’t make yourself lose everything, just to live a dream which is not yours. Wear your traveling shoes pack a bag and go for the trip, or have that perfect coffee, read that book or watch the cheesiest of shows. Do I sound like full-load-crap-typical life changing movie yet?
Pursuing happiness is the worst form of art we practice to miss out on our lives and to unknowingly walk towards a perfect picture we believe exists. One perk though, you might end up being freakishly rich. But when you stand at the exact place in picture of mountains you showed to friend, 10 years back, you would be happy thinking of that exact memory and the friend. As we all know how planned trips go, Life is nothing different.
Now how did I reach here? Well,
Just walking through the half drenched pathways, trying not to fall (only people who know my clumsiness will know), I looked across the field. I realized how often I look at those distant green fields unknowingly. Reminds me of freedom, how strange. Suddenly stumbled upon ‘nothing’, and now I know why I am clumsy. It’s because of living somewhere, well the point is, not so long ago, about last year New year’s, my motto was “Live in the moment” and you know how those things go. Came back to oh-so-tidy room, feeling completely jobless, not going to the Gym because exams are next week, not eating those creamiest of edibleness because of I am not going to the gym, watching those series and when it’s over I feel guilty of wasting my time, eating random food alot of it, still starving and within an hour repeat.
So basically, I was clueless. Looked at my windows which I never opened, since I moved in. Reason, I never had time. Basically 8months back all I wanted was my room, one cup of coffee and a book or binging series. But right now, it’s just a distant happiness I don’t even have time to pursue anymore. We don’t do things we are happy doing. 90% of things that we do, is to get the exact picture of happiness we create ourselves, which we might get in the future. We look at hundreds of things with the eyes filled with happiness, we never realize it. That may be the cute puppies in winter, a window we see everyday and always wondered what’s on the other side, the happiness that we get when we actually have a Goodnight’s sleep, unplanned night out with friends, the one risk we didn’t take, the guy we should have punched, the one we should have hold on to, trips we say no to, talking to the loner sitting across the room but we never bothered, one hour of running so to have guilt-free-carbs. People who we actually should be friends with, Everytime we see those people we know the frequency would hit it off , like the songs of Bruno Mars. The happiness that we get when you overhear the Harry Potter music or “I will be there for you” or the Simple Plan/Green day song, They just make you happy. We are the 90’s kids, the idea of happiness for us can never change. But again, May be that’s just growing up, seriously not giving you any crap about that, we just tend not to trust people, be little selfish just to protect ourselves, think about the future, settle down for things, let the world define our clothes, the air we breathe, our typical jobs, our sleep and worst is our food and body. I just can’t stop thinking about the dialogue in Queen, being the best version of yourself, may be is not being the best one in front of everyone’s eyes and trying to fit in till we die. I mean come on! There’s the exact space for you somewhere why do you need to fit in somewhere you don’t belong. Rather go ahead and ask for leg space! First we occupy someone else’s place, then we say we aren’t happy and settling down, I mean you are unhappy because you want to be that.
Reminded me of the tackiest dialogue I heard, in one of the most typical 90’s Hollywood movies. Never made sense till now “Every person have the exact amount of unhappiness they choose, just to make someone else happy. And to feel like a saint about it”
We let people tell us what we are and where we belong, worst is that we believe it. We may have hundreds of clothes, but that one-perfect-jeans is all we want. Or may be we want 💯 shoes, because we are giving up everything else and replace it with nice clothes. Healthy way to fill the emptiness 😛 That’s the reason we replace everything around us, just to make sure we aren’t missing out on anything. But we are, missing out on the exact things which we want.
Go listen, Dream dreams noone else can see by Bryan Adams, feel content for 5mins. And carry on with the heavy traffic. Because 90’s are gone. There you go 😛
Disclaimer : Just a twenty-something girl. Rumor has it, mid-twenties are worse than teenage.
Blog Challenge, passing on to Sanskruti Panigrahi, what do you think of Pursuit of Happiness? May the power be with you.